Thursday, April 25, 2019

Raofl

My sister and her partner have gone away camping, leaving their grown up children alone in the house.

Except from my nieces latest update:

Day 3 without parents: Dukey found a couple of maggots in the corner of our laundry next to our bin. He freaked out and sprayed them with bug spray, but it wasn't working fast enough and they were crawling towards him so he smashed them with a shoe. More started coming out from under the carpet though - more than he could squash - so he decided to drown them with water. But then he realised he'd used too much water and there was a massive wet patch on the carpet. So he tried to mop it up with towels and then when he ran out of towels (and I swear to god, I wish I was making this up) grabbed the fucking iron and started trying to iron the fucking floor dry. It worked a little bit but was taking forever so he gave up, put the towels in the washing machine, and wandered off into his room.
Came back an hour later. The entire back end of the house is flooded. He forgot to put the draining hose in the laundry tub. And he can't dry the floors with with towels. Because all the towels were in the wash. So now he is in the corridor with the mop, gagging as he tries to get rid of this water.
The worst part?
The.maggots.are.still.alive.
And now they're in the kitchen.