Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Story attempt for my niece

My sister would like us to write and illustrate a book for our youngest niece who turns 2yrs in December.   I had an idea for a simple picture book, and while I was happy with some of the scribbled draft illustrations what I really wanted to do was a photo montage with additions instead, and I am far to lazy to actually put them together - also it would require either lots of magazines or a colour printer and a computer larger than my little notebook or whatever it is, cause I just can't create in these conditions darlinks.

But 2yr niece is getting a little more sophisticated in her book listening, and something with more words would be the go now.  Here is a first attempt at a more wordy version of the first picture book that I never made.  I probably won't make this one either - lol!

This is the Bean Baby
she is reading a book
It made her curious
to go have a look

(not entirely happy with this verse yet)

She packed up her bag
and she packed up her books
and she packed up meow
and thats all she took
(meow is her soft toy cat)

the Bean Baby went walking
the Bean Baby went soaring
the Bean Baby went sailing
To do her exploring

She walked to the forest
She flew to the hills
She sailed over the ocean
and sent her parents the bills

The forest was tall and dark
and full of bugs and bees
Bean Baby had trouble finding
the animals for the trees
(excellent spot to do lots of animals hiding behind trees)

Then soaring the skys
eating pears in her chair
she saw eagles and pelicans
and pigeons being ware

Trekking the hills was exhausting and long
but she did get to see where welsh mountain sheep belong
(sister don't like the welsh mountain sheep - i LOVE the welsh mountain sheep - sigh - feel free to substitute any hill/mountain animal you choose)

 She road the waves on a board for a lark
The Bean Baby had a close encounter with a shark

She slept on a boat
rocked to sleep by the sea
then traveled back home to her mum and daddy

5 comments:

  1. I really like it. I will say this, however: In the first verse, you switch from present to past tense. Having read many a kiddy book to many a niece or nephew, I'm thinking you could easily get away with doing the whole thing in present tense if you thought that made it flow better.

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  2. Ah, but then you can't rhyme took with book. Never mind.

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  3. no you are quite right
    i think that is part of what is annoying me

    it made her curious to go have a look just sounds awkward

    Definitely going to work on this verse

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  4. I love it. Where were you when I was little? Rhetorical question to which I don't want an answeer.

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